phew.

back to unit. everything was in ruins. new privileges come and go. we were told we don't have to march to cookhouse anymore, but our discipline took that away. so it's back to square one..... sigh. we got screwed so hard by the sergeant because our discipline were lacking. we screwed up big time. ippt test on last friday but our standard wasn't there. many of us got silver and pass.. and even to the extend of failure.

i guess i'm the only one that maintained my fitness throughout the bike course... wahahha. :/ i agree that the 14 of us aren't that bonded yet and some even chooses their friends to mix with.... it's kinda regret to see this kind of thing happening. it happens in poly, school and outside life, never had i imagine this to happen in camp too.

is it really hard for people to mix with everyone? must people really isolate those that they couldn't click with? i'm fairly alirght in camp. i click with everyone else and i'm happy for that. i will become the in-charge next week... and i hope everyone listen to me and behave with high discipline level... something really has to be done for our bonds. well i think it will work out somehow, naturally.

hmmmmmmmmm.

i'm going to order some new clothes from zipia for cny :)

today sure ended fast!

yup today is the LAST time we ride on our precious bikes. :( today we done our cross country at mandai..... hmmmm bad experience today. we tried out a new obstacle called 'berm' well that's not exactly an obstacle.. but it is a terrain... kind of like a slope. we had to travel on the 'berm' and instead of going up a slope, we go sideways of the slope. wahahha side ways! yeh the difficulty is insane. most of us fell down on our first try and some just couldn't make it. i overcome the 'berm' on my second try :)

isn't that dangerous? i mean despite all the protective gears on us, injuries are still prone. why must the army force us to do things we don't like? or make us do risky stuffs? what if we hurt ourselves, what if we broke our leg, what if we died?

yea one incident regarding the 5 storey slope. it is a slope where we ride upwards and after that downwards. we tried the .... 5 storey steep slope with a right turn. anyway it is a slope with a turn. jesus. my friend kicked 'neutral' gear when he was going down the slope. OMG. neutral gear down the fucking slope!!!! will die or not? OF COS. see this is where our risks lies. fucking hell. lucky he did not die. lol.

i heard my unit got risk allowance of 50 bucks? what is 50 bucks when we don't have our luxury of time to spend it? lol. army... really interesting.

anyway, im all good and is in one piece. hehe. it was smooth sailing for me and i'm really glad for it. the bike course ends tomorrow and my unit requested us to go back and report to unit on the same fucking day. army, never fails to 'eat' us. whatever it is, it is good either way. my home, is now unbearable again. don't ask why. i must have my reasons for saying that. i'd rather stay in unit. home? no thanks.

i'm hype. almost ready to conquer the recce course and get my damn sergeant rank.

wahahha. yeah i won. i beat the public road test. no sweat.

but my heart does not yearn so.

what's going to come at me is going to be tougher. so tough... that i turned grumpy the rest of the day. not just me, but i think everyone feel sian and grumpy becos we know we are going back to camp.

hmmm it's not the idea of going back to camp makes me grumpy......... perhaps it's mood swings? HAHA, even guys have it?! yeah. it's true.

there will be EXTRA EXTRA EXTRA night trainings for tomorrow and the day after. how great. it eats away my remaining time for stay outs. it is going to be 7am to 9pm. OH MY GOD.

then today we learn about off road trainings. yeah off road.... riding on gravels and sand and undulating grounds. like those u see on tv. yeah its happening now. haha. it wasn't much fun really. seriously public road > off road. off road is just boring. it is risky, hot, boring and difficult. sigh i can't stand the time passing by doing off road trainings.

yeh it is definitely risky. my friend flew off from a high point and fell. lol, it was hella funny. but hell, its dangerous. lucky he's alright.

aahhh. i want a break!

oh yeah. its 2010! exactly 1 year 5 months to ORD. hahahah it seems so long away isn't it? it's definitely slow but at least it's moving and i'm not stopping.

life was as usual in 2009. nothing too difficult to achieve as long the hard work is there. that's always my belief.

it's surprising that i managed to pass every single of the bike course assessments and tests. it appears so that it's somehow... a gift for me towards the end of 2009 and marking a great 2010 ahead. i managed to pass the most dreadful balancing cum circuit test and just so i thought i had cleared every single tests but that's not the case. i have another test, a tougher test coming and it's riding on the public road test! it's about the same as riding in the training circuit but the scale is larger. more cars on the road and more hostility from the drivers towards L plate bikes.

is L plate really that nuisance to the road users??? i think not all L plates are like that right. i think L plate riders are a lot better than L plate drivers. yeah i started riding on the public road like 4 days ago, so i have around 3 days of experience on the road. hmmmm... the first day experience wasn't so good and it didn't went well. i thought i could just die on the road for being totally reckless. i dashed across 2 amber light which i think i could stop in time reasonably and a red light (OMG) which i tried to e-brake but couldn't so i just ride on. lol

scary right! i did all the dashing out at night. i think the planning isn't so good huh. it's the first day for us new learners and they made us travel at night without any experience. they were riding at 60km/h too! kinda fast for me the first time. and 60km/h is overspeeding and it's an immediate failure for us during public road assessment.

its a pain. making us ride at 60km/h during practice and expect us to ride 50-55km/h during test, irony?

hmmm the public road test is on monday morning. i hope i pass this one as well! haha.

there will also be a course coming soon, i think right after valentine's day. yeah it's the Recce course. OMG. it's do or die. really. hmmm i think it will come in 7 weeks? omg. :/ and i think the course last for 7 weeks also. OMG. after the recce course i'm really going to be a sergeant this time hehe. right after being a sergeant it will be 1 year to ORD. i'm seriously thinking too far right? :)

anyway lets all work hard for 2010!!

the tense all building up!

its been 3 weeks since the start of the bike course and so far...... i have been doing quite well lah. the world is fair to hard workers. right? of cos! i have put in a lot of effort that's why i haven't made any major mistakes yet.

tomorrow is the ultimate stress day. all the tense that was building up this week will all pressure me. ~_~ yes, tomorrow is when all the tests would be held - balancing, circuit, e-brake. one failure in any of this 3 results in a FAIL in all! ah the stress, imagine that T_T. how would u deal with this situation? kinda scary right.

there are total of 5 stations in balancing test, fail one and its a total failure for you. :( sigh the stress. i just cant help to emphasis on the stress. circuit riding is also one of the key test that many fails. i passed mine during assessments but that doesn't mean so in the real test. i'm quite confident of my skills but luck plays a big big part. T_T


my end of year present is to pass out from the bike course. really.

tired.

phobia. insecurity.

i feel time flowing through my hands.... its like grasping sand...but its efforts all in vain.

right, my bike course lasts 5.5 days a week. 8am to 5pm.

no they are all lies. it starts daily at 7am and hafta wake up at 5am and it all ends at 5.30pm and its around 6.30pm i got home. do the math.

i don't even have the time to enjoy myself... life's so miserable for me. :'( it was just a blink of the eye and its already sunday night, with the morning approaching. :'( and there i'm awake and blogging cum studying for the test tomorrow. :'(

i'm unhappy. not enough sleep!~

i'm starting to save up (finally!). but desires to go shopping and indulge in luxuries and sins fill up in me. again, life's miserable.

i got a new haircut today, kinda not satisfied with the hair. what to do, life's like that. not like i could change the army rule and keep long hair. hmm looks like i'm stuck with short hair for 2 years. god.

i want to invest in stocks, very soon, once i saved enough.

unhappiness.

today we learnt how to balance while standing on the bike. yes, standing, its as tough as it sounds. what's more, we have to clear a wooden plank and stay on the plank for 6secs while we're in standing position on the bike. that's insane.

sigh. today just sucks.